Kahulugan//

“I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind.” – Ecclesiastes 1:14

Sa dalawang taon na nawala ako dito yan na siguro mabibigay ko na dahilan ko. Maraming pwedeng ibigay ang mundong ito na karanasan na magbibigay ng konting kasiyahan. Marami. Pero, panandalian lang ang lahat. Sa huli, babalik at babalik ka sa kung sino ang maaaring magbigay ng walang hanggang kasiyahan.

“…all of them are meaningless”, sabi nga ni Saint Paul, siya rin naranasan niya na hanapin ang kasiyahan sa makamundong paraan, at tulad niya, napagod din ako. Mabuti nalang hindi napapagod ang Diyos na habulin tayo.

Blackout Poetry #2

 

Sometimes, when it happens suddenly

It takes time to sink in

“Dear God, what’s going to happen to me?”

“Everything will feel better soon,” He said

Blackout Poetry #1

I forgive the world and all its evils
I also forgive myself
The misfortunes of the past no longer weigh on my heart
Instead of pain,
I choose forgetting
Instead of vengeance,
I will be capable of loving

Blessed & Broken

         You are living a good life. It seems like there’s nothing that can stop your goals in life. Your life is sailing smoothly.

          Then suddenly without caution tragedy strikes and the worst possible things begin to happen. Everyday is like a burden to you. Your goals are crashing in front of you, and you can’t do anything.

            Your heart feels heavy. You just want to escape from all your problems. And you look for someone to blame other than yourself. Then you start to have self-pity.

            You feel broken – maybe because you lost your job, you failed your exam or you just had a broken relationship.

 “Jesus took the five loaves and two fish, looked up toward heaven, and blessed them. Then, breaking the loaves into pieces, he gave the bread to the disciples, who distributed it to the people.” – Matthew 14:19

            In this passage, Jesus performed the miracle to feed 5000 people. Sometimes in life, we can be the “bread”.

             God takes us on a journey. During this journey, we may feel lost because we don’t know what lies ahead. He may even take us to unexpected journeys. We will encounter lots of bumps. But God wants us to know that He is with us. One thing that we should do is to trust God because He has already planned a good future for each of us.

             Then God blesses us. We receive His blessings everyday but there are times when we feel that the blessings are overflowing. In these times, God wants us to share our blessings to others. Be thankful and be a blessing to others.

             The next step of God is breaking. Isn’t it ironic that after He showered us with blessings and made us feel loved, He will break us? When God breaks us, it is not out of love. He breaks us because He loves us so much. He wants us to break free from our bad habits, wrong relationships or wrong decisions. This stage can also be a wake-up call for us to examine our faith. God wants us to search for Him in the midst of chaos. He break us so that He can make us whole again, this time, stronger and more prepared for what life may bring.

             Last step is when God gives us to the world. He uses us as instrument to help others who are in different seasons in life. Always lend a helping hand and do everything in God’s glory.

            We are all important to God. We don’t know how long we will experience each stage but God knows what He is doing, and He just want us to not to give up on Him, because He will never give up on us until the end of the process.

Nagtapos na ang taong 2014 at tulad ng ibang taon ito ay lumipas na parang isang kisap mata lamang. Narito ang mga aral na iniwan sa akin ng taong ito: 

• May mga pinto na hindi ka pagbubuksan at akala mo ito na ang katapusan ng pagtupad ng mga pangrap mo. Huwag tumigil. Tumingin sa paligid at maraming pinto ang magbubukas para sa iyo. May mga plano tayo sa buhay at masakit kung hindi matupad ang ilan dito. Ngunit hindi ito ang katapusan sa pag-abot sa ating mga pangarap.

• May ilang tao na aabusuhin ang kabaitan mo dahil alam nilang may matindi kang pangangailan na sila lang ang makakatulong. Umalis ka na sa patibong na ito habang maaga pa at unti-unti kang tumayo sa sarili mong mga paa. Hindi masamang humingi ng tulong sa iba ngunit hindi rin tama ang pag-abuso ng kabaitan mo.

• Minsan ililihis ka ng Diyos sa ibang daanan dahil mayroon Siyang mas magandang plano para sa’yo. Magtiwala ka lang sa daanang pinili Niya. Maaaring dito mas lalabas ang potential mo at dito ka mas matututo. Oo, nakakalungkot talaga sa una ngunit imbis na magmukmok at sisihin Siya ay magdasal na lamang at ibigay ang pagtitiwala Sakanya.

• Mas makikilala mo talaga ang isang tao kung madalas mo itong kasama.

• Gaano ka man kadeterminado sa pag-aaral o sa trabahao may mga oras magtatanong ka sa sarili mo kung nasa tamang landas ka ba. Normal lang ito. Araw-araw pahirap ng pahirap ang kursong tinatahak ko. May mga araw na magigising ako at maiisip ko kung “Ito ba talaga gusto ko?” Ngunit madalas kong ipinapaalala sa sarili ko ang dahilan kung bakit ako nasa medisina. “Dahil gusto kong maging doktor.” Simpleng dahilan ngunit sapat na ito upang magpatuloy.

• Anuman ang meron ka ngayon, malayo man ang narating mo sa buhay ang mahalaga ay ang pagkakakumbaba.

• Magpasalamat sa mga tao sa paligid mo. Sa mga araw na masaya ka pati narin sa mga araw nanakakadama ka ng kalungkutan. Ang mga taong nakakasalamuha mo araw-araw ay meron nang parte sa buhay mo. May mga aral tayong makukuha sa bawat araw maliit man ito o malaki. Pangalagaan ito.

• Masakit mawalan ng mahal sa buhay. Parang nawala rin ang isang parte ng pagkatao mo. Nakakalungkot man, kailangan parin magpatuloy at tanggapin na parte talaga ito ng buhay natin sa mundo.

Ilan lamang ito sa mga aral na natutunan ko sa nagdaang taon. Nagpapasalamat ako sa mga karanasan na ibinigay ng 2014 sakin. Maraming Salamat sa mga taong hindi bumitaw sakin at nawa’y nandiyan parin kayo sa tabi ko ngayong bagong taon pati narin sa mga susunod pa.

Manigong Bagong taon! 🙂 Gawin nating makahulugan itong taong 2015! 😀

Dear 2013,

I was messed up when you met me. And I don’t expect that I will like you. As the days go by you made me realize that I should not settle being a mess. You were very patient in reminding me that everything has a purpose. You gave me hope and confidence to achieve my goals and to become better person.

January had gone so fast to me. I was still adjusting to a new year. February had brought me to Nueva (Peggy’s debut) and Thailand (EAFONS and vacation). March ended my student life in UST.  It was very emotional, from baccalaureate mass to our exit to the Arch of the Centuries and especially during our graduation. It’s a fresh start to all of us.  April made me form new relationships. May and my study buddies, Mcdo meals, books, Novenas, churches, coffees, (Julia, Jamie & Peggy’s) apartment. June gave me the big test and the bum life. July rewarded me of a new title as a registered nurse and it made me realize that when you really put your mind, heart and soul to your dream it impossible not to achieve it. August and the mini reunions with my Extended fam. September gave me food trips.  October gave my bestfriend and me more bonding time. November, I’m a year older. Oh November, you gave me another chance. December you were bittersweet. I gained new experiences like IV insertion in ER and driving in highway.

You also reminded me to be strong because there will be no one to with me when I’m down and the only thing that I can do is to pray. Thank you for the adventures and new experiences.

Love,

Betha Fe